New Years Eve Prep

I've ebeen busy today,
preparing for tonight.
A gathering of friends
and family
and people icare for and love.
Some won't be there,
but that okay,
i'll carrry them in my heart.
But they won't taste what i prepared:

TEXAS BRISKET



Fish, olives and capers over dill



Greek Platter



Italian platter



candied fruit
 

its been time now

Only a little bit of time,
but never the less time.
There is so much to do and catch up to...
normal routines,
new things,
cooking
and then the discovery.
The discovery of yet again why i had to stop working...
Another something found from 2006 that i do not recall,
it seems strange that there are 2 years completely gone in my life.
Missing in memory, not to be found.
It disturbs me
and yet i say;
"oh it happened then!",
knowing full well there is no return,
no jogging of memory that does not exist.
That is what i lost
and how i muddled through 4 years until this time,
mystifies me.

too many avocados and cilantro

Sometimes i use what i have and make something memorable

SOUTH OF THE BORDER CHICKEN DINNER

chicken
8 chicken pieces (your choice, i use thighs)
1 lime, juiced with the pulp
2 sweet red, orange or yellow peppers
4 small cloves garlic, minced
1 tablespoon cilantro, minced
1 teaspoon cilantro * salt
1/2 teaspoon dry annatto pepper
1 teaspoon cumin
1 tablespoon dried chili power
1 teaspoon dried smoked pepper *

separate chicken pieces and pour lime juice over each piece.  Sprinkle with chili powder, annatto pepper, smoked pepper, cumin and cilantro salt

cold Avocado soup

2 avocados
1 tablespoon cilantro, minced
1 lime, juice
1/2 cup sour cream
1 cup chicken broth
1 teaspoon cilantro salt
Cut avocados and place in a blender with every thing else.
blend on low until completely mixed.

Chill in the refrigerator until serving with a black bean and corn salsa and cilantro salt
 
black bean and corn salsa
1 can black beans (okay, you could make your own and then you would use one cup)
1 tablespoon cilantro
1 tablespoon chili powder
1 teaspoon cumin
1 lime, juiced
1/2 can chicken broth
1 beer
1 cup sweet corn salsa*

add all ingredients together and bring to a boil.
reduce heat and simmer until thick.

Cilantro rice

1 cup long grain rice
1 tablespoon corn oil
1 teaspoon salt
1/4 cup cilantro diced
1/2 can chicken broth
3 and 1/4 cup water

heat rice and oil in a pot until the rice becomes slightly translucent and add salt and broth and then water.
Bring to a boil and reduce heat until done (20 minutes total cooking time)

* - things i make at home

closing the book

i stopped by the government center today, but did not go to the lab...
that chapter of my life is over...
I drove to the center,
something that i have been able to do lately.
Someone wanted to know if i was taking any of my "stuff',
referring specifically to a poster of me as "employee of the the month",
i was not interested.

I am NOT Italian, but i love much of the cooking traditions,
tonight i am doing 7 fishes.
mussels in white wine and garlic,
lobster, shrimp, grilled radicchio and water crest salad,
Linguine and clam sauce (uses anchovies also for those who are counting)
salmon stuffed with crab
and broccoli.

I am having fun!

I have turned the page
and shut the old book!

restoration

it has only been a few days,
or has it been an eternity.
I am actually confused,
was it Tuesday last or the one before?
That is when i stopped working.
Suddenly i am up all day.
I find myself confident that i can drive,
I am able to stay up later,
but still get up early.
Is this the restoration i always believed in?
The one i knew wold happened after i stopped working?
I can not believe it,
but it is true.
and now i have time to become whole again.

spare time?

no,
i have been busy,the holiday season helps ...

Christmas cactus in time for Christmas

note it is NOT just Christmas, but Christmas is what i celebrate,
but there are a lot of other ones at this time of the year and i hope all the others are health and happy.

There has been baking - which is a tradition for me...
Baklava:  my style

Baklava

This will make 2 large trays of pastry

Ingredients:
1 package Filo dough
2 pounds unsalted clarified butter
10 cups fine chopped nuts - walnuts and pecans
½ cup granulated raw sugar
½ teaspoon cinnamon
¼ teaspoon ground clove
The rinds of 3 oranges or 6 clementines (minced)
Whole cloves

The nuts, 1/2 pound of melted butter, sugar, spices and citrus rind are all combined and mixed well and set aside

In a greased large pan, 7 layers of filo dough are placed, brushing melted butter on each.
The traditional way is to cut this into diamonds now before baking or adding nuts (and it does help).
I bake this for 10 minutes at 350 F (until just brown and a bit fluffy)
Remove and add 3 nut mixture layers - nuts, filo, nuts, filo, nuts and then 7 more layers of filo dough.
Place a clove in the middle of each diamond.
Bake for 45 minutes or until just light brown.
Heat up the Honey/orange syrup 20 minutes before the baklava comes out of the oven.
Add the syrup mixture as soon as the Baklava comes out of the oven.
LET COOL FOR 4 HOURS before attempting tofinish the cut.
The cut is equal straight lines down the pan, then diagonal cuts across those.
Marvelous!

Karidopita

(Greek Nut Cake)

(which appears to be the big favorite:

Ingredients:

8 eggs, separated
1-cup sugar
¼ teaspoon cinnamon
¼ teaspoon allspice or nutmeg
1 teaspoon finely diced orange peel
1/8teaspoon Cream of Tartar
2 teaspoons baking powder
1/8teaspoon salt
1-cup cake flour (i have used regular flour with good results)
2 cups ground walnuts or hazelnuts (remember to use dry measure)
 
Toppings:
Honey/Orange/wine Syrup or powdered sugar
 
Beat Egg yokes until thick and then add cinnamon, sugar, salt, allspice and orange peel.
continue to mix .
Mix baking powder with the flour and add into the egg yokes and mix.
Remove this mixture and beat egg white with cream of tartar until stiff
Fold the two egg mixtures together gently
Finally, slowly fold in nuts
Pour into 2 small (9” x 9”), greased cake pans and cook at 350°F for 40 minutes
If using with powdered sugar, cover plate with powdered sugar and place cake onto plate (of course removing from pan)

Sprinkle top with powdered sugar after the cake has cooled

If using the honey syrup, warm the syrup first and pour about ½ to 1 cup of syrup over the cake and cool

Serve cool

closed and thankful

it is finished,
 a 33 year career in one place,
plus 5 earlier years in other places.
I will not be tearing things apart to tell people what things are made of,
I think i will be creating some things,
particularly my cooking and
hopefully my painting.
I now can get used to the idea that i am finished and can move on.
This is good.
People tried to be nice,
some were genuine, others not.
Actions always speak very loud,
drowning out false words.
So the joke was on everyone who did not believe me,
when i said some 20 years ago that i would retire at 58.
then i thought i would on into another similar job,
in another location.
That will not be the case,
for any job i take will not be similar,
but it still might be in another location.
Those who did not believe me at the beginning of this year,
have now found out that i was speaking the truth.
It is finished, it is done
a new life awaits me now.

Sand Castles

Growing up,
my favorite thing to do at the beach was build sandcastles.
There is something which links us to the way this life really is,
it is at best temporary.
Normally i would have placed this post in my Environmental blog,
because this is about work.
For today is the day that the "provisional lab director has decided to stop testing water,
until the end of January, so she says.
She also removed all the collection bottles and intake forms just to prove the point.
It was not lost on me that this was a slap in my face,
but i said nothing...
tomorrow is my last working day
and the consequences are hers, not mine.

I also realise that this is the fight that i have been making for a great deal of my 33 years.
To test, to discover, to uncover.
I am no longer  in the fight
and it appears that i was building a very elaborate sandcastle all of these 33 years
and the tide just came in.

quiet Sunday

i am probably obviously having a great deat of trouble with the other days shooting.

Mostly because everyone wants a reason "why"
and i do not think there is "one", but many, many.
It is not like this does not happen in other places in the world,
there it is many times worse.
So i will now try to keep my voice quiet and see what i can do to help these greiving parents...

In the mean time,
I have a recipe to share.
Some of the tenderest chops i have ever cooked
and so here it is:

Pork Chops

smothered in onions and ...

6 or more center cut pork chops, bone in

4 garlic cloves, chopped
1/2 large onion, slivered,
1/4 cup red wine vinegar
1 cup rose wine
1 tablespoon salt
2 tablespoons black pepper
1 cup tomato sauce (I use a garlic, basil sauce with diced tomatoes)

spread the pork chops in a baking tray

pour the rose wine and the vinegar over them
spread the garlic on each
salt and pepper
add tomato sauce
Cook in a pre heat oven at 325 for 2 hours.
raise temperature to 425 for 10 minutes.
Serve with your favorite pasta

in connecticut

there are days we should not speak.
The days when things are too close
and yet just far enough.
Things like this happen every where,
but we are isolated from screams and pain.
Children are killed,
ripped from mother's embrace.
This was too close,
it reminds us that this world is not safe
and never has been.

There is no rhetoric or chastisement that is needed at this time,
only silence.

baking - day 2

Today,
in this morning,
I finished the first round of some of my "easy baking:
my own "Kourambiethes".
In latin cultures they are known as Wedding cookies,
but the Greek recipe does pre-date them by a few thousand years.

Not to be out done - i created my own recipe..
which is now posted below.
both yesterday and today i noticed significant differences in the baking.
The time for Baklava was shorted by 15 minutes,
It was not the oven,
today the  Kourambiethes took an additional 15 minutes,
but used less flour.
Now i know the quality of flour can vary because of the amount of gluten in it.
It varies,
crop to crop,
weather pattern to weather pattern during the growning season
and of course between varieties of wheat.
That will change the mixing and baking ability of the wheat.

Any way, here is the second days baking:

Kourambiethes

(Joe's version)

1 cup whipped butter
1/3 cup raw sugar
2 teaspoons vanilla
1 teaspoon TANG
1 teaspoon orange peel (candied is okay) or zest
1 teaspoon anise flavor
1 teaspoon water
3 or more cups flour
1 1/2 cup pecans
1/4 cup powdered sugar

These cookies are very light and fall apart easily - to make a firmer cookie add 2 eggs to the liquid mixture and more flour (i did this today)

Beat the butter 30 seconds then add sugar and TANG and beat till fluffy.

Add zest or peel, nuts, orange and anise flavor and water.
Add flour slowly, continue to beat until the mixture begins to  “ball” into clumps. (Sometimes I need to add more flour)
You may shape the cookie, keep in balls or “squash down”.  Your choice
Roll into balls and place on a baking tray and cook for 20 minutes at 350º F.
The cookies will have the edges just brown.
They must cool before removing from tray (but not cold).
Place on tray and cover with powdered sugar.
Eat at room temperature.

Pork Carnitas

The other day i found a special on Fresh, sliced, bone in, pork breast spareribs.
I would not make what i normally make with these (the Italian meat sauce and pasta),  these had a lot of meat,  So i went South.

Pork Carnitas

2 lbs Slice Breast pork sparerib, bone in

2 cloves garlic, minced
1/2 onion, sliced
1 tablespoon cumin
1 teaspoon chili powder
1 teaspoon Anchiote powder
1 tablespoon salt
1 beer
juice of 2 limes
2 tablespoons cilantro, chopped
1/2 cup tomato sauce

brown the ribs with onions and when just brown add the garlic.

Sweat the garlic and then add salt, cumin, chili powder, Anchiote powder, lime juice, tomato sauce and 2 cups of water.
Bring to a boil and let simmer, replacing liquid with water for a minimum of 4 hours.
Remove all the bones and cartilage and chop all the meat.
Reduce the liquid and add the meat back in with the cilantro and beer.
Serve on warm tortillas with roasted jalapeno peppers and cheese.

Drips and Drabs

 

Foggy,

drippy,

it is not cold, but rather chilly out.

This does not affect me.

I feel better.

My life, a series of ups and downs,

with no one to explain why.

5 days to recover from 2 at work.

That is incomprehensible.

Tomorrow, starts 2 more

and then the next week the final 2 days.

A party on the 11th of January,

for the several of us. who are leaving.

Me?

I have washed my hands,

i do not control.

I am actually doing things,

Wow!

The beginning of Christmas cooking

I love this holiday time...
for me it is Christmas, others Hanuka, others winter solstice and still more holidays around this time for different cultures than i could even hope to name.

I begin with candied citrus peekss and will use them in sweet and savory dishes.
Here you have Orange (clementines), lemon and lime!

Use a peeler and try to get as little of the with "rind" as possible (it is bitter, but a little bitter is okay many times).  Cut very thin in long strips.
Melt a half a cup of sugar with 2 tablespoons of water.
When is just comes to a boil add the slivers of peel and let cook 5 minutes - remove and drain.
Save the sugar for other uses because it has the citrus flavor in it.

Almost limbo

Am i dead?
or just sleeping,
resting,
quietly,
without dreams.

But there was sound and light and peace in that one experience i had.
And now there is a slight uneasiness in my spirit.

then there was nothing but overwhelming peace and comfort.

So this is life,
and i am not asleep,
but rather awake,
still pondering the direction i mist go.

There are noises
and dreams
and people "yammering" trying to disturb those dreams.

Directionless i drifted for awhile,
knowing what i did for so many years,
was no longer important.

A new direction awoke in my heart,
there are many who say it can not be done.
I know it will be.

Such is my confidence in this strange place i find my self,
almost limbo, but not quite.

Dreams

I dream often
and i remember many times.
Sometimes they are meaningless, simple dreams
brought about by a movie or show.
Other times they are of life and its consiquenses
and those can be troubling and keep me up at night.
Still others tells me of the interscetion of people in my life,
foretelling, perhaps what my heart sees,
but i can not tell my waking mind.

For me,
I know a bit
and what i know is that this life is brief
and each intersection with another is important.
Life is too short to be wasted by bitterness
or jelousy.
We all want, but we do not have,
because we ask for wrong things.
(a paraphrase from James).
I do not want any destruction for another,
i only wish for good.

For me, i wish for peace in my heart
and a few moments of happiness.
To do kindness when i can.

To be angry, but never bitter.

To love fully.

And not to cause trouble for another.

This is what my heart wants,
but at times it is a struggle.

preparation of my heart

i have been a bit off as of late,
the struggles were not of the norm,
rather i had put up a shell, my shell of "mind"
and i have a good one.
To protect my self from feeling,
but it is powerless to protect myself from fear
and fear was crashing at my gates.
Fear and angst,
but this is not a post about fear,
rather one of love,
Love, the opposite of fear.,
For love may be angry,
but not fearful.
The soft and open heart,
shining with love,
defeats all fear.

Mistakes?
I make them regularly,
for i am only human.
When intellect begins to reign,
i tend to make more.

A person who drowns,
may instead drown the person sent to save them.
The insecurity of another creates a minefield,
that may be set off with a word.
Silence may cut like a knife
and is deafening.
Walls are put up,
demands are made,
because of still another's insecurities.
But this is not a post of others,
but of my heart,
closing down and letting my mind rule.
It has never been good at that,
it does not feel,
only calculates.

The heart calms the drowning person so that they may be saved.
Love steps through a mine field,
confident and does not need to speak a word.
Compassion comes against silence,
like no noise ever could.
And walls always come down with a word of love.

My mind likes to be in control,
but my heart knows better!

Getting ready

I have begun preparing myself for my retirement.
I have been taking days off per my doctors request.
Today is one of those days and when i go to work tomorrow,
It will be day 7 before i do not work at the Health Department any more.
The day is mild and sunny and beautiful.

In the days i have been taking off -
some have been very busy,
others not so.
I can already see an improvement in the vision issues that i have
and the balance is improving also.
This is what the doctor and i expected.

For today I am thankful,
we have the girls (2 labs, the daughters of our lab), who provide entertainment and distraction.
I have been hoping to go through more of my mom's things (mostly pictures),
but find it difficult emotionally,
there will be time.

In the mean time there are still roses on the rose bush

and i am cooking something different
Life is good.

Chili mild with beans

(a northern apostasy) 

1 bag small red beans

1 lbs ground beef
1/2 cup chili powder
1 tablespoon mild dried chili's
2 tablespoons cumin
1 teaspoon anchiote powder
1/2 teaspoon pumpkin pie spice
1 tablespoon salt
1/4 stick of butter
1 tablespoon maple syrup
1 or 2 beers

Rinse and soak the beans over night (water level should be 3 times the beans).

brown the ground beef with the butter and spices
pour into a slow cooker set on high (about 200 F)
heat the beans and all the liquid to boiling and pour into the slow cooker.
add syrup.
after 2 hours reduce the heat to medium or low (about 160 or 140 F)
add beer to keep the liquid level up.
Do not let dry out!

Serve with rice, chopped cilantro, chopped onions and or sour cream.

Christmas 2012

I love to decorate for Christmas,
my mother acted like a little child around Christmas decorations,
These are Good times!
I decided to be different this year (when am i not?),
2 trees - one outside,
the other inside.  The inside tree is small, but really old fashion:



















The outside tree is more modern:


Of course i had to cook something and this is one of my favorite hot relishes and is dangerous
Using Ghost peppers and a variety of others - i boiled the ghost peppers to reduce the heat index (3,000,000 scovile units to maybe 1,000,000)  With lime and salt.  There are 2 women n the block who are expecting and i know this works!