i woke up last night

i was nervous,
i was "wondering",
I leave things where they are
and look to today's light.
What will be,
will be,
i must live my life as i have been called.
Yes, you heard this correctly,
a call,
one that puts me in the middle of life
and one that brings me some where else.
Does anyone understand me
or am i being too cryptic yet again.
This happens when my heart is troubled,
when my way seems unsure.
The preacher on TV does not help,
He is speaking of other things;
i have another path to follow.
I do not think i like where i am at this moment.

Thee was fog yesterday or the day before?
Rain last night and yesterday.
Warmer weather,
loss of motivation.
I can force things to go the way i want,
but that is not my way.
no lies left, only confusion.