Friday, January 30, 2009
Never a dull moment!
I have been told over and over again, I will get better. The people who tell me are my doctors, friends and spiritual people. I had one negative piece from a CNA who talked of her sister, who did not get better and who's eyesight remained double, that frightened me. The others give me hope, but there is still that small voice that keeps saying, "What if it is forever?" It is not that I want this to go on and at times I think there is real change (without the glasses), but there is fear! That fear was personified when i was out last night and the prism fresnel plastic popped out off of the glasses. I did not realize it at first, but knew something was wrong, just couldn,t figure it out. the I noticed that everything was doubled. For a brief moment I was completely fightened thinking that things were going the other way. I took off the glasses, realized one of the plastic coatings were missing and then found it on the ground a few feet away. This was scary, but it did help me know what my fear was and it is over now. So now the question is "when do I get to go back to work?"