I awoke in a sweat.
barely able to breathe.
The walls, which were bars were closing in on me.
There was no escape, I was trapped.
Trapped with pain and misery and hurt,
with no where to go and no way to get there.
I thought that I had made this prison in recent memory, but i was wrong.
Its history stretched back to a time i could barely remember.
It trapped my hear ,suffocating it,
creating a great frenzy trying to escape from a cage, a prison of its own device.
Made to protect itself from hurt,
it became the source of hurt and pain.
I looked to where my arms had been and there were wings!
And I flew and soared far away.
And the cage, the prison, was left broken on the ground.
There is at least one person in my life who has been a source of continued encouragement in my life and especially during this adventure.
I have known this person for some 25 years and when I met her, I felt that I had always known her.
When we first met, this presented a great deal of confusion in me, because she was married and had one child and I liked her husband. She now has 3 children and the same very good man as a husband. We have stayed fast friends with no danger of anything else, despite my own confusion. It is who I am.
The people at the work place did not understand and would say mean things behind her back and I would laugh at their stupidity and shallowness to their face.
At times I would be angry with them, but our friendship remained strong.
Of course, i was still confused and asked for understanding on how 2 people could be so close and not a "couple". One day after she rescued me form severe despair with a visit in the hospital , a "solution" came to me and whether it be correct or not, it brought peace to my heart and put and end to my confusion; she was simply the other "half" of my soul. Not a soul mate, because we were closer in inexplicable ways than that., but actually the other part of me and in this case she was there to keep me on my path for this life.
Where it be theologically sound or not, it brought me peace and she remains forever someone who will be close.