Monday, June 30, 2014

The Early Morning inspiration

I wake to see the lilies open for the day,
for at night they close.

I think of the lessons learned,
that brokenness is always at the heart.

Brokenness is being freed from the old and habitual power of self
from the haunting, grasping insecurity that causes us to run from others.

I think about my own arrogance

Isaiah 40:12
Who has measured the waters in the hollow of his hand,
    or with the breadth of his hand marked off the heavens?
Who has held the dust of the earth in a basket,
    or weighed the mountains on the scales
    and the hills in a balance?


Where lessons learned begin with humility,
and giving up is not an option.

Humility stands defenseless before an accuser, neither needing nor preparing an answer.

Why then do I need more words spoken to me?

So Buffy, the musical speaks to my heart:
Where's there's life, there's hope
Everyday's a gift
Wishes can come true
Whistle while you work.


So that's my refrain
I live in hell

'Cause I've been expelled
From Heaven
I think I was in Heaven...


So give me something to sing about!
Please give me something...


Life's not a song
Life isn't bliss
Life is just this:
It's living
You'll get along
The pain that you feel
You only can heal
By living
You have to go on living

Because of fear
For it is fear,
not anger,
nor hate,
fear is what is used to separate us from each other.

I am not afraid any more.


Friday, June 27, 2014

not at ease

My heart is troubled,
but i am unsure why.
I wake because the suns rays pull me from a restless sleep,
not because i want to.
Questions of "why?",
ring through my head,
I do not what the reason for the question is.
I race to finish Things,
and i do not know what happens after.
Days are sent waiting,
but waiting for what?
I have no answers,
only something gnawing at my heart,
saying soon.

Thursday, June 26, 2014

Building a Reputation

The first health director had used the information that came to him from the lab to further his own ideas, the new health director relied on the information and the results of our test to make policy, at least most of the time.
My skills with databases were becoming very strong and I ended building databases for at least three other department and there was evening work because of it.
I also used our own database to understand what was happening with well water, what were issue, what were not issues.  The new health director had me go to the American Public Health Associations (APHA) annual meeting in New York and present.  I also went to the annual American Association for the Advancement of Sciences (AAAS) in Washington DC to present the same information.
Both presentations were well received and I began to be contacted nationally regarding the information.
Unlike a private company, any information I garnered was already public information and I was open about sharing it, to the surprise of many.
The more testing I performed in the lab, I began to realize that I did not really care what the outcome was, I was not invested in the result.
The more testing we did, the more people noticed and I was featured in the local paper, along with pictures several times in the papers.  When people would compliment me on making the paper, i would make light of it saying that it was so beach goers could have a face to throw darts at when the beaches were closed.
This created a reputation for me and people would come in with problem samples.  Some times they came in with a specific thought in their mind and some times they were correct, often times their was something else.
With each person, each sample, I tried to learn something.  I did not know everything and would read and listen to anything  that I could, then I would test to see if it were true.
A fun example would address mineral build up in dishwashers, I had heard that Tang was an effective cure for the problem.  Intuitively, I understood that the citric acid in Tang, would dissolve minerals, so I devised an experiment, drying calcium carbonate in a glass breaker.  I added a teaspoon of the orange powder and it dissolved the minerals in warm water.  Not content with the lab experiment, I went to the home of friends who had very hard water and added the powder to a regular run of the dishwasher, not only did it clean the dishwasher, the dishes were also sparkling for the first time in years.  Doing the "what if" thing was working nicely for me and I passed on the info.
The Environmental Health division was changing and more person from that department were looking for help with problems they were finding.
They began to ask for my help in designing the surveys.
One particular survey challenged someone with money and influence and used tracer dyes.  I had to prepare the entire procedure because everyone was sure it would be challenged.  The orders coming from the results of the test were challenged and then appealed at the state level.  Our orders stood.  My results stood.
I now had the respect of the state.
At this point the lab workers were paid significantly less than the Environmental Health personnel with a "RS" behind there names.  I thought that if I were ever to challenge that structure, I needed a "RS" or Registered Sanitarian certification.
I took the test, without studying, finished first in the group taking the test and received the highest score that had been.
More insects came to the lab for identification, some so strange, they would baffle even the experts at the State agricultural Experiment Station.
We used them a great deal, even using them for bizarre, experimental methods to help identify unknown items that were brought to the lab and now they knew us on a first name basis.
Several nearby (and some not so nearby) health departments sought our, okay in reality, it was my help in testing recreational beach water. There were several non-profit environmental agencies looking at the Long Island Sound and they began asking for help with some of the water quality questions they had.  Knowledge with them was a one way street, I gave and they kept, but here I met an environmental activist, but realist, who volunteered at one of them.  Art Glowka and I would become good friends and he would share what ever information he could, but he was best at asking questions and I was best trying to find answers for him.  This was a symbiotic relationship.
Lyme disease began making news and we were sending the ticks to the Agricultural Experiment Station (Ag Station) for testing.  While one of the environmental health persons did the bulk of the work, we took it over after only a few years and it became a lab function.  The Ag Station appreciated our screening of things that were not ticks and our reputation increased.
Of course working in lab, we wore protective clothing, that is white lab coats.  It was obvious for persons coming into the lab that there was a great deal of medical work going on.  The white lab coat generated an unusual response from the general public, they thought we were doctors.  This was understandable for we did much clinical testing for the health department programs and for the medical community in Stamford.  Sometimes even our secretary had people open up to her on the phone concerning medical issues because we were the health department lab, but as we became known as a tick testing center, people would come in and ask any one of us if such and such was a tick bite and an article of clothing would be removed.  While for a short time one of the technicians was an MD waiting for his internship, we mostly had to calmly and carefully explain that we were not doctors and they needed to put what ever they took off, back on.
While this was a bit humorous to us, we all took the time we had advising the public very seriously, they trusted us and with Lyme disease and other issues this was very serious.
We tried to follow the Centers for Disease Control's guidelines and we told the persons coming into the lab for advice exactly what was recommended.  This brought me into some conflict with the lab director since he felt I was giving out medical advice and challenging doctors who were not treating people who had obvious symptoms, including the bull's eye rash, but rather waiting for a blood test that was at best unreliable.  I had no problem with it, but both us agreed that there were real reasons for "chronic Lyme" that went beyond an infection.
I wanted an educational seminar to educate doctors, but that was not going to happen.
Rabies crossed the Hudson river and began killing the large, urban raccoon and skunk population.  Again, we were the primary source of current information for the public, doctors and veterinarians and our reputation grew.  The reduction of the raccoon population by 95% actually affected the water quality at the beaches, improving it because the storm drain system was where they lived. 
I wrote more informational papers.
Outside of the lab, I volunteered for a non profit organization, setting up a lab that could test for chlorophyll.  All I asked was that the data collected be shared and it was.
New organisms were being recommended as the indicators of polluted recreational water by the US EPA.  In previous years, I was looking for this new indicator organism (enterococcus) along with the previous one (fecal coliforms), well because.  I continued, trying to link old information with the new, but then I noticed something interesting.  Using fecal coliforms, I was never able to predict when they would be elevated.  Part of the reason is that in warm water, they would grow if there was algae around.  Now fecal coliforms and even E. coli  are  defined as being from warm blood mammals, but they exist just fine in a normal environment without any source.  In fact they live just fine in soil so not all of then affect health.  The enterococcus was a pathogen and more the levels would increase in the bathing waters after a heavy rain and then disappear after a day.  I did not know why the organisms seemed to dissipate after 24 hours, but with a lot of testing, the evidence was there. 
The health director embraced this and made it policy. 
I wrote a presentation which reached the ears of the State of Connecticut policy makers, who passed to on the US Environmental Protection agency, who passed it on to the US Geological Survey agency.

For Connecticut, the recommendation was for all coastal towns to find ways to enact this concept of preemptive closure based on the Stamford model.

Wednesday, June 25, 2014

How I Almost Lost This Dream Job And What My Boss Did To Save Me


During my lunch times or times outside, I began finding different pieces of jewelry and I wanted to know what it was made of. 
My dad had been a jeweler at one point in his life and had imparted some of what he knew. 
As a chemist, I had studied the different properties of metals and did some tests.  My boss went on vacation as I found some very beat up jewelry that appeared to be silver.  I dissolved it and tested it and found it was silver, but it was now in solution and I wanted to bring it out as pure silver.  I had dissolved it in nitric acid and I thought, let me neutralize the acid with ammonium hydroxide, nothing happened, so I left a small flask with maybe 10 mLs of liquid on the counter a left for the evening.  Ammonia-nitrogen compounds are not stable, Ammonium-nitrate-silver compounds more so.  It explored destroying the flask and leaving small droplets of silver ammonium droplets within a 25 foot area.  They popped when you stepped on them,  They left a black stain on what ever they touched with in the area.  There was no other damage, but the black spots could not be covered up.  When my boss returned, I was brought into his office and read the riot act.  Simply put, if I ever tried anything like that again, he would find some way to terminate me. 
Like the chemicals I worked with, if I became too agitated, I had a short fuse and could explode, but when I was wrong, I was wrong and I was contrite enough to agree never to do anything like that again. 
The next spring, recognizing that part of the issue was boredom, he sent me to an entomology work shop and with the bit of knowledge I had from being an insect collector as a child, I became the laboratory's in-house entomologist.
While I was definitely shaken by my experiment gone wrong, it also shook off what ever malaise had been affecting me.  I began to develop a fire within me, again.

 Next:
The Fire Takes Off

Monday, June 23, 2014

Next

Simple - The MRI came back clear,
but the why for the new headaches remain

Saturday, June 21, 2014

The Fire Takes Off

Each sample that came to the lab left an impression in me.  We had no computers to compile all this information, but my mind retained it.  Homeowners were bringing samples because they wanted to know the mineral content, more specifically how hard the water was.
I added several tests relating to this because, well i was curious.
A representative of a national treatment company began bringing sample for potability testing and because i was curious, i would take a small sample and do extra tests with it.
Some where deep inside, the usefulness of these numbers was beginning to come alive, for they showed a bit of truth and they were not supporting the contention of the treatment people.
My first battle for the homeowners in Stamford had begun.
The battle only lasted a short time with this company, they left the area not willing to do a pitched battle with reality.
They were replaced by others, some claiming that the devices they were selling would cure every thing, i called consumer protection and they left.
Some treatment companies were not so hostile to the truth and actually allied with the results i would find in the lab.
I was sent to speak to the North Stamford Homeowners association because of these battles and was well received.  With as little as i knew (that of course, i did not know then, but now i do), I sounded like an expert and people began to bring in more water samples.
A group of brothers who were all well drillers, started to use me exclusively for all of their testing.  I believe i learned more from them, than they from me.
They brought back into my life the little creature, iron bacteria.  While iron bacteria has no health effects, it does a great job creating a mat effectively stopping any filter.  This i had learned in my short stint at the oil company lab, now this knowledge was becoming useful.
Chemistry was having an impact and helping people and I was beginning to feel useful, again.
It also meant that the thing in my being that got me in trouble in some of my previous jobs, that feeling that truth should not be hidden, was useful in this job.
Some where i learned of the power the health department wielded for on a Sunday, working at my part time job, i went to lunch at a fast food restaurant downtown.  There were roaches everywhere and i brought it to the attention of the manager, who treated me very rudely, finishing his tirade at me with "IF you don't like it, tell the health department!"   I replied something like, "I am the health department", and the next day i went to the primary person in charge of restaurants who proceeded to inspect and issue orders to the fast food place.  The manager treated him rudely also and a letter was sent to the corporate offices of the fast food place and the manager was fired.
I was impressed because there was much that could be done to help people, though i realized that this power could also be misused.
A summer's day, a lunch in the administrative office of the health department and everyone feel ill, including the health director.  This was my first experience with food borne illness.  The lab director knew what to do, i did not.  I watched, listened and learned.  Samples of every food were brought to the lab and tested.  The verdict?  It was the cold rice salad that had been left  out of refrigeration for too long.  Staph toxin was the result and my eyes opened wide.   I had known about chicken and eggs and pork and those issues, but rice, i never would have thought.
From that point on we would assist the Environmental Health personnel with food borne investigations.
As a public health lab we were not exactly under any other department , but we were supporting all of them with our testing.  We were under the direction of the health director, who was considered to be an agent of the State health director and we were considered to be an arm of the state lab.  There were times my direct boss, would expand without direct authority of the health director, but with his permission, such was the next element of testing the lab became involved in.
An undercover police person asked my boss if we could tell him a baggie of white powder he had purchased in an operation was cocaine.  Since we had been screening for drugs for the half way house in urine, testing this was easy.  My boss agreed and we began testing a few drug samples for the police.  This soon became a large cache of drugs from every CI (confidential investigation) and arrest for possession brought to the lab every three weeks.
The best part of this?  We got money to buy equipment!  As long as in some way it might be used for drug testing for the police the boards approving money requests would not say no.  I ordered many things that we needed for water testing, which could also be used, sometimes, for drug testing.
This money did not allow me to buy every thing i wanted, but the testing program was coming more into line with best practices and that made me happy.
More homeowners were coming to us with samples of their well water.
While i was both busy and happy, my boss still kept a watchful eye that i did not do anything else stupid, for a long, long time.
The testing we were doing for the shellfish beds were basically a monitoring of the treatment plant.  The method was long and tedious and the beds were initially under the regulation of the state of Connecticut and we were doing them a favor.
A massive undertaking by the Water pollution Control department (part of the city, but not) to find sewer lines not connected to the treatment plant resulted in a lot of testing and i was included and then there was overtime, lots of overtime.  The Food and Drug Administration (FDA) began to take an interest in all shellfishing areas and began to regulate the labs which did the testing.  The state accepted us and they felt it was no problem, but the exercise to become certified was examining a control sample sent by the FDA that resembled testing the shellfish themselves, not just the water.  My boss never forced me to anything, but he had a way of encouraging that was very persuasive.  The certification was for the analyst and my boss wanted me to be certified.  The testing took seven days and in the end i became certified to do the testing, along with my boss.
With no further straying on my part, the work became more intense.  There was still a slow time in the winter, but it was not as intense and i was busy changing more tests, trying different "standard" methods to see what would work best.  I had discovered i could always order chemicals, one of our grants seemed to cover it.  More of the public would come in with different things for us to look at and most of the time it fell to me to try to find out what it was.
My reputation began to grow and my greatest ability was actually listening to people to find out what was really needed. 

The forensic testing was growing and another technician was hired strictly for that work, but there was enough for me to get involved often.

more tests

Chilly today,
MRI tomorrow....
no that is not how it is suppose to go,
but there have been new "things" going on.
New unusual headaches,
forgetfulness in mid sentence,
of words,
not though.
Words themselves,
at time become jumbled.
It might be due to the throbs of pain,
not that severe,
but nevertheless,
discomforting,
that course through my head.
Not the normal headache,
but reminiscent of those i had before...
before the operation,
the ones that were signs,
of the tumor pressing against my brain stem.
Besides the discomfort,
there is fear,
not of death,
but of going through the trauma of an operation again
or rather of the recovery after the operation.
Yes,
this is a lot to chew on for a Saturday morning.

Friday, June 20, 2014

The Lab and the First Two Years

The building was a small two story brick building, the second floor had been an add on a few years previously and it housed the entire health department.
The lab, which had previously been in a single cramped room on the first floor, had been moved to the second floor and was some what spacious for its time.
All the labs i had worked in previously were in basements and this lab had windows that opened!
It was not a well equipped nor sophisticated lab, but it was functional.
There were mismatched pieces of furniture and a couple of actual lab benches.
There were well, a total of four instruments; a pH meter, an ancient spectrophotometer, another ancient fluorescent spectrophotometer and a non-working gas chromatograph.
There were chemicals purchased years earlier, that had not even been opened.
This was not just a water testing lab, but basically did the work for what ever grant the current health director was ale to get money for.
The unused gas chromatograph had been purchased many years earlier to test for pesticides from an old dump in North Stamford.  Finding nothing, the machine laid covered with dust.  The chemicals were from an air sampling program that was finished.  The amount of clinical testing done by the lab was impressive and was funded by the state VD (as it was called back then) program.  When things became more regulated, our lab would be ranked "highly complex" because of the skills needed to interpret bacterial plates and quantify the level of infection of a syphilis test. 
I was comfortable with those test and i became comfortable with the person who ran most of those tests, a sophisticated Jewish lady, who had significant hospital experience, but preferred the slightly less pressured job at this lab.  She was also the best phlebotomist i have ever met.  She was also doing drug screening in urine for a nearby half way house.
Another grant for lead poisoning and anemia screening had another lady doing the very demanding work of going into the community and finding children who where at risk.  The lady, a very bossy and no nonsense person, was perfect for the job and had a drive to make sure the children in our town were safe.  I liked her and had great respect for her work.
That left our boss and me and that made four people who would work in this lab.
The lab director was brilliant, extremely knowledgably in microbiology, genetics and immunology and he taught classes at the nearby branch of the University of Connecticut in those subjects.  He left a state job in the laboratory in Hartford, just to get this lab started.  He was well respected by every person i every met who worked for the state of Connecticut.
He had little water chemistry experience and that is where i fit in.
I began in October, just after the busy Summer season and in someway it was very good that things slowed down, there was so much to learn!
The water testing performed by the lab were primarily on water brought in by another section of the health department, the environmental health section, whose personnel where all certified by the state of Connecticut as Registered Sanitarians or RS for short.
These were mostly new wells and the tests that we performed in the lab were very simple, dipstick and colorimetric tests.  The chemicals used were mostly pre-packaged in the amount needed for a single test and many tests used a hand held color wheel to determine how much of something was in the sample.
There was a hierarchy of what tests were performed meaning that if something was elevated something else would be tested for, but only if the first test came back elevated.
A good example of this were the staining metals, iron and manganese would only be tested for if color or turbidity were elevated.
According to the lab director, we were suppose to be using methods described in a "bible" of water testing called "Standard Methods", but the practice when i first came was much simpler than this.
An example was sodium, it was only tested if the amount of chloride in the water sample was over a certain limit and sodium was not tested, rather it was calculated using a simple formula.  There was another formula to use if the sample had a treatment unit, but neither were essentially accurate.
I was invited to change all of this.
On occasions, a home owner with a well would show up and ask to have their water checked.  Most of the time it was only for "potability", which meant a bacteriological test for a group of organisms called total coliforms.  If you had any, the water was considered not potable, or not drinkable and the home owner was told they should contact a well person to fix the problem.
This test i had performed in other jobs and was not unfamiliar to me, but then came other microbiological tests.
For the summer, the lab tested the quality of the water at the beaches and this was beginning to take me out of my comfort zone.
Then the environmental health people would bring sample that were suspected septic failures.
Then i was asked to test waters for the shellfish beds using an abstract microbiological technique called MPN (most probable number) using a multiple tube method.
I was really out of my comfort zone.
My extra courses in college in biochemistry, did not prepare me for the field of microbiology. 
The little bit of work that i had done previously, did not prepare me for all that i needed. 
I spent the first year and a half learning about media and general testing, i barely understood what the numbers meant.  By the busy summer time i was at least prepared, as a technician, to do the work required to monitor the public beaches and shellfish areas, but i was still unsure of what the results actually meant and even took some of my results to the health director when "fecal coliforms" out numbered "total coliforms" in one set of results.   He told me that they were different organisms, something i know now to be erroneous, but what did i know at this time?
I still had so much to learn, but learn i did and in my second year, i became more confident and had added three tests that had not previously been performed and changed several methods to more correct ones.
A few more home owners brought samples to the lab, this was unusual because our existence was not known to the general public.
Problem plagued the lab, money problems.  Grants bought people, and instruments, but there was no grant for water testing, this was the lab manager's vision for the future of the lab and so, without a grant, there was no money.
Without a grant, buying a new instrument was virtually impossible.  There were ways, but first step was to convince the laboratory director that it was worth the effort to push something through the budgetary process.
I had not learned this skill and did not make much headway on things i thought should be changed. 
I was losing ambition and becoming frustrated.
Because of this and other factors, in my third year, during the slow time in the Winter, i became bored.
Perhaps it was a combination of things for i believe i also became complacent.
It is one of my complaints about civil service jobs, if you do not want to work, you can get by doing just enough.  Now through out my career, i have heard many people call civil service employees lazy, i was not because i had another part time job and was volunteering the rest of my waking time at a local shelter.  I am even unsure that other workers are lazy, but certainly many are uninspired.
At the end of my second year I was giving up and losing my fire to find out "what if" and the lack of funding to get the equipment i thought we needed was also grating on my nerves.
It was because of all these factors that i allowed myself to be only the lab technician and was doing things by rote.
During my boss's vacation, I played.


Thursday, June 19, 2014

The Job that kept me



It was at this time i had several offers and i needed to make a choice.
Another food company, a major cosmetic company or a local health department.
God must have been smiling on me that day, for i chose the local health department and it chose me back.
So what could i mean by this statement, "It chose me back"?  In Stamford, for civil service jobs, a test is given.  The test might be very generalized or it might have very specific questions.  It is claimed to be impartial, but if those in the decision making process have some one in mind, the test maybe slanted for their particular knowledge.   At this moment, an impartial observer, knowing the outcome of this particular job, might believe that i had someone on the inside.  I did not and i had ranked number 5 on the test, which is the lowest score to even have a shot at the job.  A month passed and i really did not think i had a chance at this job and interviewed at the two other companies. 
Back to the particulars, in Stamford, concerning civil service jobs, the persons ranked 1, 2 or 3 are considered, well first.  It was those 3, who had "connections" with those who made the decision of who would fill the position and it is always assumed that it is one of the three who will get the job.  What happened next, is to me miraculous, for the first three ended up NOT wanting the job, for various reasons.   That left the two unknown persons, me and another who had worked with me in a previous company, for the Lab director and the Health director to choose from.  The interviews were held, multiple of them, questions were asked and there were many things i simply did not know, for much pertained to microbiology of which i had only the tiniest of experience.  The lab director, my future boss, told me later that it was my little bit of knowledge of water microbiology that set me apart from the other gentleman and i was given the offer after two weeks.
Meanwhile, i had some decisions to make, i had two other offers, both in large corporations and the starting salary was close enough to be considered the same.
Both labs were sophisticated, the promise of interesting work and advancement was definitely in the forefront and i would be titled as a chemist.
I was advised to take the civil service job, even though i was only going to be titled as a laboratory technician and monetary advancement was limited to union negotiations.
I chose wisely and took the city job.
It was a good thing i did. 
Within a month, one of the other companies moved to a location significantly further away.
Twenty Years later, the other company closed down and all the employees laid off.
I was to continue in my new position for over 33 years.


Tuesday, June 17, 2014

Stranger days

That old nagging ache,
which came on as a tin of bricks,
seems to be returning,
but in a milder form.
It now is accompanied by several other,
different issues,
one which is hard to describe,
the other is just a strong ache in the head,
that i do not recognize.
The telephone answering "tree",
allows me to leave messages,
but no one calls me back.
It is becoming a comedy of errors,
but i am not laughing any more.
The stoppage of thought in mid sentence,
is occurring more often
and that more than anything else,
annoys me.

Monday, June 16, 2014

Becoming Lost

I have just come back from some time way and after 4 days, have not gotten my act together.
There are some extremely good medical things occurring with "routine stiff" (weight, blood sugar and general energy),
but there are some more serious concerns...that weird headache, that was a sign of the tumor they removed 6 years ago, has returned for the first time in almost 6 years.
it is mild and now getting a hold of doctors seems like moving in molasses.
Tightening in the back of my head where the operation was centered is becoming at times painful...
and seems to be making my balance worse.
Getting hold of the neurologist seems difficult.
Then on top of everything, my request for disability has been denied because what i have is not meeting the criteria for disability.
There is an intense frustration going on at this moment...not fun.
Paperwork is wearing me down and i am not very happy.

Sunday, June 1, 2014

The Boring Stuff Or The Prelude To My Real Job

The prelude is that i loved chemistry, from before i was a teen.
Or perhaps i enjoyed that i wanted my curiosity to run wild.
Of course at that time in my life, i had no clue what even the word, chemistry meant, but i loved baking soda and vinegar and sparks that flew from the 4th of July sparklers. 
I asked "why?" and there a few answers, I would ask "how?" and some more answers came, i asked "what if?" and got shrugs of "who knows".
The question "what if?" flooded through my being, i needed to know.
The colors that i could change when i mixed things out of my first chemistry set (i do not know for sure, but i might have been ten).  "What if" came to the front again and i would add too much and they would turn an ugly brown.
The instructions said that there was nothing dangerous in the set, but occasionally, i was rewarded with a small poof and a cloud of acrid smoke bellowing from one of those test tubs.
My "what if" question was growing louder.
A third grade teacher told my parents that i would not amount to any thing that used math, not engineering, not science, she was so wrong.  I was only seven, but i loved to explore, places and things and "stuff".
Fast forward some years to my junior year in High School, not my favorite time of my life, i did not like high school.  It was not really notable except I began to make only "A's" in everything, including math.  I was introduced to computers and programming languages the first year and got in trouble when i wrote program that crashed the "tie line" that 2 schools shared with one central computer,  That year was 1968.
I had a really bad chemistry/science teacher, who acted like she had all the answers and there was nothing left to learn after her class.  I also had really good senior friend, who did not have all the answers and he was going to be a chemist.  I do not know what became of him, but he encouraged me and i passed that obstructive teacher.
My senior chemistry teacher was crazy, but excellent. He encouraged experimentation and i was hooked.  We made things, extracted caffeine and did "quantitative analysis", basically figuring out if some element was in "something" and that was my favorite part, tasking something apart to its base elements.  Wow, was i hooked.

College was not easy, i was in advanced everything and i was particularly "dumb" in that i took, with everyone's blessing, an "overload" of courses (that means more than 18 hours per semester) for 2 years.  After almost burning out on physical chemistry and a graduate level biochemistry, i regained my senses and took fewer courses.
"SO THERE!", i thought mockingly to my never to met again third grade teacher, but it did take 5 years to complete the courses for a degree in chemistry, and that included retaking Physical chemistry and barely squeaking by in Calculus.  Still i did fine, making the deans list a couple of times.
College prepared me for being able to work, but was very incomplete in giving me the all knowledge i felt i needed, but it fed that hunger of "what if?".  In labs, there were so many experiments, from synthesizing Sulfanilamide to using optical lasers.  A failure to make a compound for a class in Instrumental Analysis,  did not mean a bad grade, but the teacher told us we had to describe our failure and postulate why it did not work.  This was invaluable, for i learned nothing was a failure, if one could learn from it.
While at school, i took 2 jobs in my field, one as a clinical chemist assistant for 9 months and the other at a big oil company research lab.  At the research lab, i was introduced to a creature known as iron bacteria, one that would[i] follow my career the remainder of my working days.
i loved what chemistry was becoming, i loved that it helped people, i enjoyed finding out "things".
As i finished my course of studies, i made a major move.
The move was not because of chemistry, nor a job, it was based on a search for spirituality and since this is about work and not my life, i will leave it as the only explanation, but suffice to say, chemistry followed.
My first job, after graduating, was in a corporate environment, a lab whose main function was to trouble shoot problems.  I found out things i was not allowed to talk about, that bothered me because some were true public health issues.
I was too young to think i should make copies and keep them "in case", but i did not.  I had a huge amount of curiosity and some times did extra tests that damaged instruments (such as trying to get an Infrared Spectra of methanol in vapor, which caught fire).  After nine months, there was a reorganization in the company and i was let go.
The next job came from an unlikely source, i was doing temporary work as an accountant at a large bakery and they needed someone to take over the main chemist job as she was going on maternity leave.  I loved the job and it gave me insight into a well run company that cared about what it produced, it was actually a family owned conglomerate. toward the end of my year, it was purchased by a corporation and the end of the lab onsite was coming to a close. While i was working, molds, shelf life, determining the quality and containments in the products used to make food that every one would eat were things i learned. I definitely learned more in this one year, than when i was in school, but they could not make my position permanent and i moved on.
A one year stint with an independent environmental consulting company, where i got to see more of the country, visiting and testing on site where we were hired.  I enjoyed this, but the parent company wanted testing of garbage.  This was only to determine combustibles from non combustibles, but the lab director fudged my data, as simple as it was, with as much error as it had doing the simple sorting that was necessary and i left.
A 2 week stint in a local cosmetic company doing quality control tests and my big, complaining mouth got me in trouble.  Truthfully, i was bored by the entire procedure, there was nothing interesting happening, just boring routine tests that really did not tell anything about quality of  the product.  I spoke my mind.  Maybe be i was looking for something wrong, maybe there really were problems, but they were following FDA regulations and i was not going to be a "squeaky wheel", they told me i was no longer needed.
It appeared that my loud mouth and attitude was going to have me hoping from one job to the next, but it was not so.