Support

While I have been going through my adventure, there have been a number of people who have been "rocks" for me and I treasure each one, but the one I actually treasure the most is David.
I wrote some time ago about David, because of who he is, his brain was damaged at birth so he does not always appear to "have it all together", but he does sometimes show more intelligence than his brainier housemate (me). One of the things the doctors tell me is that the double vision that I have is not a physical problem, it is a problem with my brain. There has been enough trauma to my head that my brain can not put together the 2 images each of my eyes see correctly. I think of David, sometimes he moves into the way because he is trying to get out of the way, picks up an item next to the thing that he wanted, opens the dishwasher door a leaves it so (till he empties it some hours latter), to remind he he has to put things away still, leave a cabinet door open, because what he just took out will eventually be put back there, can not drive because of these perceptual issues and usually can not tell the left from the right. These are functions of the brain trying to decipher all the many things that are around it and failing. Seeing how well he manages his life with these difficulties, makes me appreciate his struggle even more. I just have an eyesight issue, and I am not saying it is not hard, it is trivial compared to what David has been dealing with his whole life. And while he is a bit slow and some what more deliberate in all his actions, he has a heart. While some people could not be around me after the first few weeks, he stuck closer, encourages me, helps correct the negative attitudes that would creep in, gives me encouragement, walks to Target to pick stuff yup that I can not and is always there to help me in anyway he can. Today he will walk me to my doctors (who is close) because he does not want to see me fall ever again. This is David. I will take his heart over my intellect any day.

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A short Break from boring environmental stuff

Some know that I have in my house 2 disabled persons...This is part of a commitment I mae with several others many years ago, which one day I will get into, but this post is about David.
David is older than I, but was born prematurely and was given either too much or too little oxygen and so has some cognitive defects. He can not drive a car and some times he has trouble adding money, but he keeps a fair checkbook. His father has past and his mother lives with his sister in Vermont, but has some significant dementia. He is not mentally ill, but he volunteers at Laurel House. He is able to work, but is on disability so he can not work too much or he will lose his benefits which include health insurance. At this point his limit is $960/month. Most of the jobs he gets, he gets on his own, his manner is pleasant and very sociable and sometimes his bosses forget that he is disabled. He worked at the front desk of the Y for a long time until it closed down and for the most part, they treated him well, save for one person, who wanted to punish him because he couldn't operate a computer, but that is past.
Laurel House has an employment program which gets people to work at simple jobs for various businesses for a small salary. David has had a couple of those jobs. The last one was at Marshall's and that came after the Y closed its doors. They had agreed to get him to work 4 hours a week on a Saturday and that was it. So he continued looking while trying to work at Marshall's, but the District Manager kept cutting his hours out as not essential. This was a measly $38 a week which was added to his $58 a week unemployment check. State said he made too much money for them to kick anything in except $10 in food stamps. So he kept looking. He loves animals and he takes care of a dog and 2 cats in our house and a bunch of birds of various kinds that he raises from chicks for a friend.
We found out that PetSmart was opening in Stamford and got him to apply, but they would only accept online applications so the Laurel House person helped him apply.
Weeks went on and we didn't hear from them and then they opened and he called, they never received the application, so he applied again went for an interview and has a job at the pet hotel.
In the meantime he still had the off and on again job at Marshall's and it was suggested that he leave it so he could work all his hours at PetSmart.
Most of the time Laurel House is very good, but they wanted this position to be there for other members in the future and were very strong about him keeping the job until August. Meanwhile the district manager was still playing his games with the hours.
Finally PetSmart wanted him to work a Saturday that he was not scheduled at Marshall's and you guessed it Marshall's changed their mind.
As they say, the fur began to fly and I was madder than a wet hen!
No way was he going to say no to a job that was going to give him his $900 a month for some stupid place that couldn't make up their mind.
David has a significant support group and all of us backed him as he wrote a letter explaining the multitude of time he had been removed from the schedule.
So he had a victory. PetSmart loves him, the animals there love him and he gets to make a living wage doing what he loves (its living since he is supported at our household).
Peace to all.

reversal

For of those of you who read about my friend with the tsunami of troubles, some caused by the HD, there has been a turn about. A couple of weeks ago the landlord (a cousin of hers) contacted the HD for an inspection. They came and asked me after that because I had specifically asked if they could delay things till after school ends (tomorrow) because her children would be down in North Carolina with grand Ma after that and she would have until September to find a reasonable place. They were more than happy to do so, but it turns out the landlord is not doing his part, but surprise! In this case the HD will come to the rescue. Apparently, Code violations are handled the same a condemnation, its done at the landlords expense. So the last laugh will be done even as he shows the apartment, telling the prospectives that she will be out at the end of the month.
By the way the HD social service help her get the ex to court and get the needed child support

A light at the end of the tunnel

I thought of the comments from StamfordTalk about editing posts and know that the feelings that occurred during this latest flurry of posts are as they occurred and the feeling of anger and hopelessness exist in these situations and so there will be no editing.
There is light though at the end of this tunnel and though the laws and codes that I have written about have no heart, the majority of the people enforcing them do. They are bound however to respond according to those laws and codes that have been set forth to protect people, but they are allowed to do so in a timely manner and to provide help to allow the negative impacts to be minimal.
This is what appears to be happening, orders are being written, but they are being 'delayed' so that time for compliance can occur. The order has to do with an illegal cellar occupancy and over crowding - it will take one month to be enacted (?)/enforced and it that time 3 of her children will be down in North Carolina with their grandmother leaving herself and one child in a now uncrowded apartment.
In the meantime, other persons are becoming involved so that perhaps what appeared to be a bleak tragedy may have a much better ending.
-The ex who is not helping maybe brought to task by the powers that be.
-a better place may be found for my friend and her children.
-employment maybe offered to her son who graduates from high school.
A lot of maybes, but they actually seem possible.
Did this loud mouth some what mad chemist have any thing to do with it? Maybe my loud mouth helped.

It seems that everyone in these situations needs an advocate who isn't overwhelmed by the actual situation.

The system does not work part 3 - maybe a final entry

I thought we were going to have a happy ending, I thought the complete redo of this apartment was going to be a blessing, but alas I was wrong. It turns out that this two room with a kitchen going for $1200 a month did not meet minimum housing standard sizes for the four persons to be living there. Rightfully the code specifies size - one person gets a bedroom of 70 sq ft, another add 50 square feet and each additional adds 50 sq ft. She would need 220 sq ft of bedroom space to meet the minimum requirements. I don't have the figures, but apparently this one does not and according to sources, should not even have been approved in the first place. There is also a cellar, which is finished, but for reasons of safety (no egress except through the apartment) should not be used as a sleeping space. So sometime soon the landlord will be issued a condemnation order and my friend will be force to find other substandard housing to provide for herself and her children. Will the Department of social services be able to help? I really hope so - it is the heart side of the code enforcement side of the health department and the relocation person is aware and involved. Will my friend allow herself to be helped - that is another question that I cannot answer. When a person has been burned too many times, they shy away from helping hands.
The cracks are wide in the system and if there had not been a fire, this would have never been discovered.
The rules are blind to the plights of people who only make $1200 a month plus what ever extra they get on side jobs.
And unfortunately, many of the people enforcing the rules have forgotten their hearts for what the 'code' says.
And yes this is a rant and a condemnation to all those who follow the letter of the law.