The song that had been so pervasive in my life is hiding for a while...
i am not worried...
i have a lot going on, most very good and it keeps me very occupied.
so while i still cook and create or adapt recipes
and while i look and enjoy the wonders and beauties that are here to see,
they are the pulling me where i would like to be.
Yet i am not quite.
There will be a post soon,
one that i started, but have not completed regarding a mixture of things...
all of the have to do how i live and garden and harvest and cook.
It is coming but it is not done yet.
So then this is just a post to let you know i am okay
Showing posts with label general ramblings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label general ramblings. Show all posts
Thursday, September 22, 2016
Wednesday, April 8, 2015
Still not writing that much
but i have been busy with lots to do.
The writer's workshop is today and i have some kinks to work out in the final chapters of my memoirs on work.
This has been exciting for me to write and i have gotten a lot of good feedback from the group, many who are published (but i guess i am also, since i have published scientific papers, but this is different).
Distractions and things that i have to do, warm weather, then cold...you would think the warm weather would not be a distraction, but it means i get to work in my garden, which is a major passion!
the cold, rainy weather we have now is just putting a dampener on everything, especially my emotions, but it will be over soon.
well another bit written and now i go on!
The writer's workshop is today and i have some kinks to work out in the final chapters of my memoirs on work.
This has been exciting for me to write and i have gotten a lot of good feedback from the group, many who are published (but i guess i am also, since i have published scientific papers, but this is different).
Distractions and things that i have to do, warm weather, then cold...you would think the warm weather would not be a distraction, but it means i get to work in my garden, which is a major passion!
the cold, rainy weather we have now is just putting a dampener on everything, especially my emotions, but it will be over soon.
well another bit written and now i go on!
Saturday, March 21, 2015
coming down (or is it up) from rest
Coming back after being on kind of a retreat was hard,
but the week became so busy, in such a short time that i felt my head was spinning.
Now we have snow again and it allows me to quiet again,
but this time i have internet,
so i get around to blogging!
It seems that i do less talking, than singing here
and so very few know what is really going on in my life any more.
I think i want it that way, speaking in a somewhat cryptic voice allows me to be freer in my expression, but not today.
Most of us the the northeast US are sick and tired of the cold, the snow and this relentless winter that started in earnest in late January.
We should be thankful that it did not start in October as I remember it doing so when I first moved here.
I have forgotten to be thankful and i blame the weather...
There is always more because i was away and loving the early Spring just a few hours south of us.
The weather patterns have changed, though most do not want to acknowledge it.
It affects our moods, but many handle it better than i.
Doctor appointment coming, normal and typical of my life now, but i am not that happy about them any way.
I still have panic attacks where i think i can not breath, they are in my mind, not my body. I think they are me remembering what happened on the operating table so many years ago, almost 7.
Anniversaries of remembrance have come and gone - my mom's passing, my dad's birthday, but the hardest one was of the last time i saw her alive, just before her death.
Strange how our minds work, how we remember things and what becomes good and what remains difficult.
I am still writing my memoir of my time at work. When finished, i will seek to publish it.
enough rambling for now.
but the week became so busy, in such a short time that i felt my head was spinning.
Now we have snow again and it allows me to quiet again,
but this time i have internet,
so i get around to blogging!
It seems that i do less talking, than singing here
and so very few know what is really going on in my life any more.
I think i want it that way, speaking in a somewhat cryptic voice allows me to be freer in my expression, but not today.
Most of us the the northeast US are sick and tired of the cold, the snow and this relentless winter that started in earnest in late January.
We should be thankful that it did not start in October as I remember it doing so when I first moved here.
I have forgotten to be thankful and i blame the weather...
There is always more because i was away and loving the early Spring just a few hours south of us.
The weather patterns have changed, though most do not want to acknowledge it.
It affects our moods, but many handle it better than i.
Doctor appointment coming, normal and typical of my life now, but i am not that happy about them any way.
I still have panic attacks where i think i can not breath, they are in my mind, not my body. I think they are me remembering what happened on the operating table so many years ago, almost 7.
Anniversaries of remembrance have come and gone - my mom's passing, my dad's birthday, but the hardest one was of the last time i saw her alive, just before her death.
Strange how our minds work, how we remember things and what becomes good and what remains difficult.
I am still writing my memoir of my time at work. When finished, i will seek to publish it.
enough rambling for now.
Monday, July 29, 2013
but wait, there's more
i have know for a long time, that the person who i kind of look after (and many times, he looks after me as well) and who has brain damage from birth; is affected by many things.
he can go into a fog if his allergies act up too much, or if it is too hot (but not too cold).
If his blood sugar is too low (never too high, but he has hit in the 40's several times in the last few weeks, and his doctor is not concerned).
Emotional things (like the passing of his mother last year, and who would not have issues with that?) or a sister having issues at her home.
It does not quite work in exactly the same way as with most people, so i keep tabs on him, keep him active, challenge him often and thing work out.
I always thought he was different,
I am not so sure any more because i think the same goes on with me and others, but in each a very different way.
Ah, that makes sense because we are not the same (no matter what western medicine says!).
he can go into a fog if his allergies act up too much, or if it is too hot (but not too cold).
If his blood sugar is too low (never too high, but he has hit in the 40's several times in the last few weeks, and his doctor is not concerned).
Emotional things (like the passing of his mother last year, and who would not have issues with that?) or a sister having issues at her home.
It does not quite work in exactly the same way as with most people, so i keep tabs on him, keep him active, challenge him often and thing work out.
I always thought he was different,
I am not so sure any more because i think the same goes on with me and others, but in each a very different way.
Ah, that makes sense because we are not the same (no matter what western medicine says!).
Tuesday, June 18, 2013
sucess
In the past few months, i have attempted to improve my overall health.
Doing more has brought its own stress, but also a special reward.
I started in February at 245 pounds! yes, you heard correctly,
i was badly over weight.
I also was at a point of not caring.
My blood sugars were averaging in the 140's to 160's first thing in the morning, but not going too high even after eating.
Today, i am 200 with a goal of 190 before the summer end...
and my blood sugar? Today it was 99, the best in many months with averages about 120.
I do not think i changed that much in my eating habits, but then again, maybe i did!
The wild weather , a very wet and periodically hot June has brought molds and mildews out in basements and crawlspaces and damp closets.
Now molds may trigger an asthma type response, but they also may have a hallucinogenic effect on people.
I had some heavy exposure for a few days and my mood did go south (even though there was cause also).
benadryl helped and removing the exposure also.
Better times are coming~i hopw!
Doing more has brought its own stress, but also a special reward.
I started in February at 245 pounds! yes, you heard correctly,
i was badly over weight.
I also was at a point of not caring.
My blood sugars were averaging in the 140's to 160's first thing in the morning, but not going too high even after eating.
Today, i am 200 with a goal of 190 before the summer end...
and my blood sugar? Today it was 99, the best in many months with averages about 120.
I do not think i changed that much in my eating habits, but then again, maybe i did!
The wild weather , a very wet and periodically hot June has brought molds and mildews out in basements and crawlspaces and damp closets.
Now molds may trigger an asthma type response, but they also may have a hallucinogenic effect on people.
I had some heavy exposure for a few days and my mood did go south (even though there was cause also).
benadryl helped and removing the exposure also.
Better times are coming~i hopw!
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