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Born a Texan, but traveled the US extensively.  Now staying on the East coast.

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Reflections

I have been very intense in the struggle of survival the last several weeks, working at physical recovery while I blog about who I am, spiritually, emotional, how my past lead me to little old Stamford and my struggles here.

The eye sight is still a mess tho improved. the ability to swallow food is really much improved and the pneumonia seems to be vanishing, balance and walking are improved, but I still need a walker to keep me on my feet.
When I first came here I was almost in a dreamland and at that time I was only working on me. and I am back to looking inside. See I can be very controlling and in some ways that is good - while here I have let thated part good, things happen at home and I am unfazed, I actually do not want to control anything. There was a short temptation to take things back, but I will not. People will fit or not into my life and it is better if I am surprised b that. I will not be forcing things.
The other part of me is very very impulsive, this will take more work and as I work with physical therapy, I can see how much I want how quickly and it just doesn't work that way. I have to slow down or I will fall on my face. Yes I can stand without support. but I need something near by to grab when I lose my energy. I want to run uo the stairs, but I have to walk slowly.

Back to Stamford, my involvement with the mentally disabled has always been positive even when things did not go that well, I could always learn and respect that they were trying to the best of their ability. These are people do not understand because they are different and don't always look so 'normal' and I relate to that. I also can relate to the working poor who are so plentiful in Stamford, that most of us don't even see as people passing us by. Theyexist and are mostly mistreated by all of us and some times even the rukes design to protect them.
Stamford is a very selfish city and one day when it grows up, there will room and acknowledgment for all these people.
Meanwhile at night I would continue to work with Scott, One of his companies was providing first class music for hotels and restaurant around the nation. He works closely with a restaurant group out of Greenwich called CB5.
He provides the DJ music to most of the clubs in the area including the GRAND, Twenty, the Dragonfly, Barcelona, Baang and many more out of the area. It is fun going to his special events and helping lug his stuff and dancing to his music.
I also am one of his IT people and things can be fun as well.

so maybe I know a little about Stamford, its nightlife and some of the drama that goes on in the restaurants. I do have some fun.

An d soon slowly, I will get back to it.

more tomorrow.
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