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Born a Texan, but traveled the US extensively.  Now staying on the East coast.

Sunday, July 26, 2009

Circles and Walls

I for whatever reason, have just realised that I have a series of "walls and circles" when it comes to people.
I think most people have them and I am sure that many people realize it, I did not.
When I first meet a person they are either brought inside a wall or left out side. If I think they have a certain level of trust or I think they might be trustworthy they are brought in. This is like a test ground and they might learn some superficial things about me, but it is a wait and see type of thing. I can like them and even care about what happens to them, but do not talk about love or try to be too pushy, they will find themselves on the outside quickly.
As trust begins to build (and time seems less important than activity), I actually test them by telling them about me. I do not necessarily like myself in all aspects, but I do have respect for what I have done. Not everyone would agree.
If that does not scare them off, I begin to trust them and they come into the next level. There is a lot of respect for those people from me and I would do almost anything for them. If they do not make it to this level, they can stay comfortably at the first level.
Then there are those with whom my trust level is so deep they can say almost anything to me and I to them and it will not change the bond, I learn the most from these people.
They are my partners in my life and its path.
I am often surprised at the number of people at these levels, 8 at the deepest level. 4 at the next deepest level level. Many at the second level and the first level constantly changes.
You who read this blog are privileged to learn my mind and heart because I am basically working things out in word as I write, enjoy the ride!
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