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Born a Texan, but traveled the US extensively.  Now staying on the East coast.

Friday, December 11, 2009

Experiencing Life.

It has been cold finally and it is strange for me to say it.
I do not like cold weather, yet this year, i want to experience it.
I could not tell you what last year was like, cold, wet, snowy or anything, it is only a blur in my mind.
My mind was focusing on getting better, becoming me again after having lost me.
I want to see snow.
I do not like the snow that happens in Stamford, it becomes ugly and dirty and create dangers and difficulties getting around, yet I WANT to experience it.
I have other strange things happening - I FEEL people's presence, when they are near or far, if they are in trouble or not, what their mood is, what they are going through.
It is not like seeing their face and knowing, it is like knowing they are around a corner and what is going on with them. It is kind of intense.
Is all of this because of the loss of a tumor?
Or is it because of a loss of my self for some indeterminable time period?
Or is it just that my heart has been wakened from a long slumber?
I do not have an answer, but it is some of the changes I like.
Tonight, as a celebration, i am attempting to make Baklava.
I think that is an appropriate way to celebrate.
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