I'm not "happy"

2 men are in an auto accident. One gets out and casually inspects the damage, the other comes out red in the face and really upset, but he is particularly short.
"I'm not happy!" He says
The other replies, "So which of the other 7 dwarfs are you?"

That is how the fight started...

I thought of this today as thing after thing just did not happen for me at work.
My 2 main supports sensed this and both came to visit for a bit, which was refreshing, but still the problems persist.
It seems I am the expert the city has on the Scofieldtown mess and so as people barrage them with questions, many are differed to me. And those making decisions are asking my input.
Now if they could only get my salary right...
Yes you heard me, I have been working 4 or 5 complete weekends and they got my hours correct on one of them. One they overpaid me and that had to get corrected the next weekend, the others they are putting in more and more furlough time (which is unpaid time) and so I get less and less in the check.
Of course my eyes are really bothering me and that is not helping my attitude.
I come home and really can not rest because I am agitated, so I do the next best thing, cook.
Tonight - Tacos and enchiladas and saffron rice - true comfort food!
While I buy the tortillas, everything else is from scratch, so it does taste good.

Of course my little plight seems to pale into insignificance compared to my blog friends from the Philippines. Please visit any of the following blogs
cherie of this side of town
a small group of friends in the Salttype society
I think if you visit these 2, you will be drawn into the rest of the collection of an amazing group of people who have just suffered (and maybe suffering again) astounding loss.

suffering

I have to do a double post today, Something has been running in my head for several days and it has to come out.
In this world, there is suffering.
This is one of the starting points for Buddhism (if I am correct) and not so different than some Christian teachings.
I have become acquainted with suffering personally. It is not something i would have chosen, but now it is here, it really is not so bad (Today). Even tho i have my bouts, i am more at peace with it than you might think. I am learning. I figure that is what is all about. Not being bad or good or being punished or rewarded, it is about learning.
I have friends who are going through terrible things, an awful divorce that is rewarding a drug user and crippling him, but he does have something to learn. I hope he does.
His mother who is in great anguish that this has happen and people who are lying are getting rewarded (this is not her perception, it is the truth).
A friend who is going against some of her own standards in order to survive in a world which seems to have pitted everything against her.
My mom who just had her closest childhood friend and relative die.
The list could go on, but there is suffering!
How we cope is the lesson.

Whoops,...

Lets see there are many song that come to my mind right now...Whoops, I did it AGAIN, and many more, but my favorite is an old Gene Autry Song... "Back in the Hospital Again"; or was that the saddle?
Yes folks as I thought I turned a corner, I fell, quite literally. Lost consciousness on Thursday and well on a West Broad sidewalk. Lost 2 days because my shunt worked to well and my swelling became concave. I just got back today...after the good Doctor tied off the shunt on Saturday. As Stamford Talk said there are many wonderful people there. I would include Stamford EMS, who picked me up and brought me there. So my wondrous adventure has become still more interesting and my life continues. I would love to know if there were any witnesses, cause I would really like to know what happened, I did not see any Advocate article.

Pain

of course getting better is an issue of facing pain. As my eye sight strains to come back to normal, I have headaches from muscle eye strain... An yes they are getting better! The struggle though is intense. Additionally cause I do not have that "pillow" of swelling in the back of my neck, the muscles are having to re-adjust...and that is muscle pain, some what alleviated with Advil (Neither Alieve nor Tylenol seem to work on this). Of course we are also in the middle of fall allergies and my sinuses are giving me grief and so this is 3 points of different pain, 2 of which are directly related to getting better. I will take the pain because I can now see the recovery. At night, when rods and black and white is the rule, I see singlely. In the mirror, I see one of me at close range. A counter top will appear with all of its items singlely, until something moves or I see past it. Distance is different. at 3 to 4 feet a pinpoint of laser light is correctly found on the right side, but at a distance it is found on the left. With this there is some nausea and so my weight is down still a bit more (and I could easily lose another 15 pounds without worrying). I was over weight before, but carried it well. I am still covered by my sick time, so I do not worry in that area (one true advantage for worrying for the city for 29 + years.) The advantage of still doing okay with all this still surprises me. I have found out what gifts all the people in my life are, even if they are not what I expected or what they presented. All of you who read and responded to this series have added something positive to me. Those in my life who connected added something to me. I have learned still more about what gifts are and I have learned more about suffering and pain than I wanted to.